What I need in a computer is the reliability of a hammer and the versatility of hot iron. With both, you know what you’re going to end up with, a hammer and cold iron. No surprises! I hate, and by hate I mean “round and round the fires of hell in death ‘till I have my revenge!” Microsoft products. I hate the way designers think. I hate the advertisements. I hate pissing away more time with security updates than their are hours in an actually day.

I feel this intolerance is part of my Paleolithic upbringing. As a wee little cave boy I would while away the hours plating various fibers into twine for snares, and fishing line. Or weaving baskets for the various odd jobs like fermenting rye. Yes you can! Ill get to that in another article. My point being, that with a firm grasp of mechanical principals and piercing curiosity I was able to rely upon the soundness and solidity of the material world. Their exist examples galore, I assure you, of materials wholly or in part unsuited for particular tasks. Bunch grasses that make better mats than twine, stone of a grade that it must be fired and quenched before knapping to name a few.

It falls to the itinerant cave man to know these limits and procedures, some hard won from bare rock. That is why I’m getting a Mac. Never have I skinned something to have its hide return inexplicably. Nor after fire softening wood to bend into a form had it straighten without cause. Why then should I put up with crap analogous to that from a typewriter? As a poet/journalist/madscientist “yes that is a compound word!”/mystic I feel that I have the right to expect performance out of tools. The cost/utility coefficient is something Apple understands that Bill Shitforbrains et al do not.

As someone completely lacking in sanity, I would never recommend that anyone follow my example. Normal people should resign themselves to mediocre products and productivity. After all, The Man owns your work before you’ve even started doing it! Having been carefully trained since birth to think of your labor as someone else’s property, what the hell difference should working software make to you? As long as the video games are HotShit, computers are fulfilling there function.

Creative people with work to do, however, need reliable tools to accomplish that work. Not for The Man to run off with and sell for a premium, while you rot in a slum apartment! The Man! Wine glass in his hand, cigar in his to thin lips! Laughing with his friends about exporting jobs, all the while ramming caviar in his distended maw! You go on working for The Man so he can afford the rising price of my art! After all, who wants to live in a cave?